When my heart was grieved and my spirit embittered, I was senseless and ignorant;  I was a brute beast before you. Yet I am always with you;  you hold me by my right hand. You guide me with your counsel, and afterward you will take me into glory. Whom have I in heaven but you? And earth has nothing I desire besides you. My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever. 
Psalm 73:21-26

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There’s a pivotal scene in the 1996 version of the film Emma, in which the main characters, Emma and Mr. Knightley, argue as he holds her accountable for the harsh way she treated a mutual friend. Emma was stressed and in a moment of frustration with the mutual friend’s usual quirkiness, humiliated her in front of their social circle.

“Were she prosperous or a woman equal to you in situation, I would not quarrel about any liberties of manner. But she is poor, even more so than when she was born, and should she live to be an old lady, she will sink further still. Her situation, being in every way below you, should secure your compassion! Badly done, Emma!”

This scene has been a reminder to me over the years that insecurity and humility are not the same thing. When what I’m striving for or experiencing here on earth drives me, I often experience anxiety, insecurity, stress, doubt, and fear. I may not react with harsh words as Emma did, but sadly, I often respond with withdrawal. You can imagine how that affects the people around me, especially those I love the most. 

I believe humility is a vital part of processing hardship of all kinds, like the grief mentioned in Psalm 73. In humility, we can live out the second part of that scripture—letting God guide, counsel, and strengthen us, knowing that the striving here on earth is temporary, but our home in Heaven is forever. The closer I get to humility and living my life with a truthful understanding of my place in this world as a follower of Jesus—no more, no less—the more compassion naturally drives me, and the less anxiety consumes me. I believe the earthly by-product of humility is more peace, more human connectedness, and a deeper walk with Jesus.

Next Steps

No one escapes hardship. For me, remembering who God is and what I’m made for helps ground me in times of struggle or joy. Reflect on the things in your faith life that cause anxiety and the truths, like Psalm 73 that may ground you. The song Who Else is a great reminder to me, and below are some scriptures that have been helpful to me: Philippians 4:6-7, Deuteronomy 31:6, Psalm 86:8-10 and Psalm 13:5-6.It’s not too late to sign-up for Willow’s 21-day cohort, Handling Conflict Better. You can do so by signing up here.