While Jesus was having dinner at Matthew’s house, many tax collectors and sinners came and ate with him and his disciples. When the Pharisees saw this, they asked his disciples, “Why does your teacher eat with tax collectors and sinners?” On hearing this, Jesus said, “It is not the healthy who need a doctor, but the sick. But go and learn what this means: ‘I desire mercy, not sacrifice.’ For I have not come to call the righteous, but sinners.”
Matthew 9:10-13

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As a math teacher, I went to a multi-day workshop for a new curriculum. The presenter asked us to gather around so she could demonstrate a project from the program. She didn’t have her space set up well, and by the time my colleague and I reached the area, there was no room to see. Rather than muscle our way into the crowd, we stepped back and began a quiet, serious discussion on implementing this new technique in our classroom. 

Once the educators were seated again, the presenter scolded the two of us in front of the entire group for not participating. Honestly, I mentally checked out after that. I lost respect for the presenter and could not pay attention to anything she said. My biggest takeaway that morning was never to make my students feel like I felt. Instead of challenging a student from the front of the room, I quietly go next to them and gently ask if I can help get them started. Their response is usually favorable, and they are willing to keep learning from me. Proximity matters. 

Applying this outside the classroom, I have intentionally befriended people of different backgrounds, cultures, and faiths—or no faith at all. I am curious and ask questions about their traditions, beliefs, and cultures. I intentionally show them respect and never want them to feel dismissed.  I certainly don’t want them to feel insulted because then my witness is dead in the water. Building a relationship is a slow process, but respecting someone means you put in the time to learn about them. 

Jesus was a brilliant example of warmly welcoming people in love. He didn’t preach condescendingly to the “sinners.” Instead, He sat and had a meal with them.  He took time to socialize with them. He defended them to the religious elite. The crowds were drawn to Jesus as He radiated mercy and love. We are called to do the same—radiate love so people are drawn to the light.

Next Steps

Sometimes, a fun exercise is to put yourself in the place of each character in the story.  How would it feel to be the host of the party? The invited “sinners”? Jesus’ disciples? The Pharisees? Who do you identify with most? Why? Who do you want to be?