The Lord says:
“These people come near to me with their mouth
    and honor me with their lips,
    but their hearts are far from me.
Their worship of me
    is based on merely human rules they have been taught.”
Isaiah 29:13 

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In 1986, Saturday Night Live comedian Dana Carvey introduced the world to Enid Strict, The Church Lady. Listen closely and you’ll still hear her shrill, smug voice quoted today: “Well, isn’t that special?” The Church Lady readily listened to excuses for missing church, dressing down, going to the movies, or whatever, but no reason was ever good enough. Her self-appointed role in the faith community was simple—high five what’s right (in her eyes, not God’s) and point fingers at whoever’s wrong (in her eyes, not God’s).

Sadly, Dana created this famous satirical character based on his family’s firsthand interactions. His mom would bring the family to a Sunday potluck only to be greeted by stares and glares for being absent from the morning service too often. Dana’s response? He publicly poked fun at the smug piety that all too many religious people demonstrate. And he nailed it, just as Isaiah does in Isaiah 29:13.

Questions about church attendance (and other Christian behaviors) make me cringe. Yes, I believe followers of Jesus should gather regularly, ideally weekly, for sincere worship, discipleship, fellowship, serving and evangelism. But showing up in person at church doesn’t mean a person’s heart is present or postured toward God. Self-righteousness, legalism and shame go against the grain of the gospel. Christ came to bring love, forgiveness, joy and peace—not burdensome rules and regulations. There’s a time for rigor and discipline, even accountability, but if we prioritize religious compliance over humble affection toward God, we miss the mark.

We’re all a mixed bag when it comes to the state of our hearts before the Lord. The last thing you or I need to be guilty of is demeaning others without weighing our own conscience, motives, and actions. No one is perfect, even though anyone who trusts and follows Jesus is made righteous as part of God’s family. Instead of asking, “So, where were you on Sunday?” maybe we can simply say, “I missed you. How are you doing this week?”

Next Steps

Hypocrisy happens when we misread external behaviors as a sign of sincere love for God. Make a list of activities that you believe Christians should do regularly. Then, go through the list and identify one or two that you sometimes do for the wrong reason. Ask Jesus to forgive you and renew your heart toward Him.