Hear this, you foolish and senseless people,
    who have eyes but do not see,
    who have ears but do not hear:
Should you not fear me?” declares the Lord.
    “Should you not tremble in my presence?
I made the sand a boundary for the sea,
    an everlasting barrier it cannot cross.
The waves may roll, but they cannot prevail;
    they may roar, but they cannot cross it.
But these people have stubborn and rebellious hearts;
    they have turned aside and gone away.
Jeremiah 5:21-23

My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, because human anger does not produce the righteousness that God desires.
James 1:19-20

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My oldest child, Kristen, was 3 years old. I was running late to her dress rehearsal for the dance recital.  Juggling my 1-year-old with one hand, I sat on the park district studio floor, using my free hand to change Kristen quickly. I was anxious for her to join the choreography. My daughter, who normally ran out to execute the routine, refused to go, and no cajoling made her move. Kicking myself for being late and rushing her, I became even more frustrated. The instructor eventually came over and immediately said, “Do you want your bunny tail on? Here, we can put it on temporarily by scrunching up the tutu and wrapping the elastic around it like a ponytail.” On went the ball of faux fur bunny tail, and off to the center of the floor ran my sweet baby girl with a huge smile.

How did the teacher know? How did I not know? Doesn’t matter. That moment taught me a huge lesson. Sometimes people can’t articulate their emotions. Often people don’t know the true root of their discomfort. When someone is in distress, perhaps our job is to observe, listen to every word, watch their body language and pray for guidance as they speak. First, we must fully engage with what they are communicating before we think about our response. At dance class, I was hurried and jumping to reactions, guessing at the problem but not observing the situation I was probably thinking about myself and how I looked in front of the other moms instead of immersing myself in what my daughter had no words to articulate.

James 1:19 instructs us in a particular order. 

1. Be quick to listen
2. Be slow to speak
3. Be slow to become angry

As humans, we have difficulty listening to others, fully listening beyond only their words. Listening to the Holy Spirit can be more complicated because we must work even harder to tune out our thoughts. I want to be on the right side of Jeremiah’s warning and still myself to listen to God and embrace all of who He is.

Next Steps

In your next conversation, take a deep breath, slow your thoughts and listen without thinking about what you are going to say next. Then, in your next prayer, do the same thing with God. I did exactly that after I typed these words, and tears came  to my eyes and a smile to my lips. God, the ultimate listener, knows us better than we know ourselves.